A little over two years after the demise of the infamous Ohio roadside oddity, Big Butter Jesus, the Solid Rock Church has erected its replacement. Locals have already begun referring to the statue as the Hug Me Jesus.
I will be the first to admit that the finished product is certainly something to behold. The weird thing to me is that Cincinnati’ Fox19 was out there as the statue was being installed and they chose to post some very bizarre photographs.
For example, I know somewhere there is an unspoken rule that mascots are not allowed to appear in public without their giant heads in place, lest they break the spell. But apparently that same rule doesn’t apply to giant statues of Jesus when they are sitting in a parking lot.
Just look at that image! It’s like something you’d see late at night on the “God Channel” when they try to do wacky spinoffs of the sitcoms the rest of us heathens watch:
Mary, Mother of God: Jesus, what’s going on up there?
Jesus: I can’t find my body! I can’t find my body! I’ve looked everywhere!
Mary, Mother of God: Jesus, just turn around. Your body’s right behind you.
Jesus: Oh yeah, there it is!
(Cue Benny Hill Theme Song as Headless Jesus chases his head around the room)
But it gets better. While there were no reports of accidents, any unaware motorists traveling along I-75 during the installation would have certainly thought they were witnessing a sign of the Apocalypse once they caught a glimpse of this disturbing scene on the horizon:
Anyway, the new statue is in place and all is right with the world again. And hey, if you read this article in time, plans are underway to officially dedicate the new statue on Sunday, September 30th, with a special prayer service and even fireworks. Although given the fact that the last statue to hold court over the Solid Rock Church’s pond burned to the ground, one has to question the decision to launch bottle rockets around this thing.
You can read the full story on Fox19’s web site, here.
And if you’re not worried about going to hell because of it, you can watch a short video of the Big Butter Jesus burning here.